8 Tactful Ways to Address the Dreaded ‘Why No Children?’ Question in Singapore
Last updated on 2 Sep 2023
The dreaded question.
Popping out ever so often at family gatherings and casual work get-togethers.
Singapore’s emphasis on family as a cornerstone of society means that childfree people often encounter this pretty intrusive question.
“So ah… when are you going to get attached and have children?”
Yet, the reasons for not having children are so personal!
It could be due to diverse reasons like infertility, challenges finding a partner, financial constraints, sexual orientation, psychological trauma or simply lifestyle preferences.
We’re not sure that you’d enjoy your auntie or your boss (gasp) probing you about these highly personal matters over festive gatherings or at the water cooler with curious eavesdroppers.
Fret not, the team at AAT has got your back and prepared a few funny, gentle and non-confrontational answers!
8 tactful, non-confrontational and sometimes light-hearted responses:
Starting off with humour to stave off your unwelcome audience…
1) You know, I’ve always had trouble keeping my plants alive. Maybe one day I’ll graduate to a goldfish and then we’ll see from there!
2) Oh, I’m still trying to figure out if I’m more of a cat or a dog person. Maybe when I’ve figured that out, I’ll think about kids!
3) Sustainability Concerns – I often ponder the sustainability of our world and sometimes wonder if it’s the right choice to bring a new life into such challenging circumstances. It’s just something I’m still grappling about.
4) My career has been quite demanding lately (e.g. too much travelling, long hours), especially in this competitive Singaporean environment. I’m taking things one step at a time.
5) Before thinking of kids, I’ve set a goal to travel more. Some continents like Antarctica are tricky, but I’m hopeful!
6) I think it’s wonderful how everyone creates their own version of family. For some, it’s with children, and for others, it’s through different meaningful connections.
7) Life has so many paths and possibilities. Right now, I’m exploring some projects now, but who knows what the future holds?
8) You know, living in Singapore has its perks, but the high cost of living here really does make you rethink certain life decisions. Raising a child is a beautiful journey, but it also comes with significant financial responsibilities. I just want to ensure that when or if I take that step, I can provide the best possible life without compromising on the experiences and opportunities for my child.
Navigating personal questions, especially those about very personal issues like having children in Singapore, requires a understanding cultural nuances, context and personal boundaries.
As “face” is important in an Asian society like Singapore, these non confrontational replies also ensures that the conversation remains respectful and harmonious.
Hopefully, the above mix of light hearted and more philosophical suggestions would help you answer people who unknowingly overstep personal boundaries with grace and empathy.
And if you are someone who likes to ask such questions to everyone you see, maybe you’ll think twice next time! 😎
About Us
“Age Alone Together” is a Singapore-based blog created by a group of family and friends passionate about empowering individuals and couples without children to embrace their golden years with confidence, grace, and connection.
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